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You need to take steps to protect yourself, the same steps your stbx is following. Open a clean bank account in Based on her earlier experiences from working at a larger daycare center, she would certainly earn significantly less than this if she were just a center staff member. Fortunately, I earn enough that her income is not our main source. However, for most of those who work in larger institutionalized daycare centers there is little economic incentive to become a dedicated professional. Until we value children’s “first two years” and formative experiences as much as we do public education we continue to have a minority of truly excellent daycare options. These letters capture the basic problem here. If you want good care, you need good teachers and caregivers. That usually costs money – particularly now that women, who do the vast majority of these jobs, have more lucrative employment opportunities. But the more expensive care gets, the harder it is for people to afford it. And it’s not just the lowest income Americans who struggle with the costs. Increasingly it’s the middle class, too. Yes, that should sound familiar: It’s a bit like health care, where access is increasingly difficult for members of the middle class as well as the poor. That’s why Pelosi is absolutely right to link the two and to suggest it be a top priority for policymakers. your name only Lock down credit with the agencies Take out half of the money from the mutual account, and put in the new account. Deposit nothing more into the mutual account. Video tape all items of value List out all debts and assets Plan for this to go south, amicable divorces are only amicable until the other party realizes they can get more. Demand the house be sold and proceeds split, she can buy you out. At least review with a lawyer, but since she is a lawyer and be consulting with one, you should get one as well. I'm sure you can find one to help, whether she knows them or not. Best wishes